I am on my sickbed. I have been here for 3 days, and although some may call it man-flu, I am only a man and it feels pretty crap to me. And, if for no other reason than I don’t want to pass this on to someone else I’m opting to stay in bed/on the sofa until I’m properly recovered.
As a consequence I’ve seen too much telly. I’ve also watched a load of things I’d probably not have bothered with, and luckily I’ve seen some good things too. In particular I have seen four films. I have finally seen “Up”. I enjoyed it, I even enjoyed the cynical manipulation of my emotions which is the opening 10 minutes. I’m not of the opinion that it’s the greatest animated movie made, to be honest I’m not sure it’s even the best animated movie of the year, but I have no doubt it will win the Oscar for best animated feature.
Unfortunately I also saw possibly the worst film ever made. Certainly the worst film I have ever seen. This film should be destroyed, deleted, redacted. No trace of it or any record of it should ever be found. This film is the execrable “The Whole Ten Yards”. I only watched this because I have a vague recollection that I was passably amused by the original ‘The Whole Nine Yards”. Why anyone thought a sequel was a good idea is the first question, surely the original couldn’t have been a big enough box office success to warrant a sequel? But once that mistake was made, why did any studio, any producer, anyone(!), think that the plot and script for the sequel was worth doing anything with other than shredding? The plot is nonsensical garbage. The script is absolute crap. But so much bigger than that, there are two truly hideous performances in this film. Bruce Willis shares top billing with Matthew Perry. Perry should be embarrassed by this movie, and he should purge it from his resume, but in comparison to Bruce Willis and Kevin Pollak he has nothing to be ashamed about. Pollak is landed with a pantomime character, very poor make-up and his performance is as ridiculous as the role he is landed with. Willis can only try to hide behind the script, in every other way his performance is appalling, most of the time he is over the top, sometimes just hamming it up. Even when there is a possibility within the terrible script Willis is given to play a little more sensitive he fluffs it, the worst performance he has ever given, but then, why bother, even if he’d given his greatest performance ever, the script, the direction and the editing would have left him mired in a dung-heap. A film to avoid at all cost.